As the new year approaches, the looming anxiety of the next 12 months can start to grow.
Strange pressures and worries begin to pop up, like “do I need to lose weight?”, “do I need to earn more money?”, “do I spend enough time with my friends?”, “is my time running out?” and many more.
Remember: it’s only natural to have these thoughts buzzing like irritated bees around your mind.
Every new year’s eve I begin to descend into slow madness.
There I am, glitter on my face, wearing my fanciest party dress, downing jägerbombs like I did at 18 and very much not keeping up. Yearning for the sweet release of my fuzzy little slippers, and that traditional 1st of January mid day nap!
I begin to panic, because I am surrounded by, as we all are, waves and waves of information that tells me that who I am, and all the things I have done up until now, right now, is wrong.
That I haven’t done enough, or achieved enough, or ran a 5k yet. That I should be hitting the big time like so-called “self-made” billionaire Kylie Jenner, who is about as self-made as my year 3 art project. Thanks Nan.
But what if (sorry, Kylie Jenner) this whole time I have been good enough.
We have been good enough, worked hard enough and tried our very best.
What if those were the thoughts delicately floating like bubbles in our minds, just as the clock strikes midnight?
If 2023 is the year of anything, I think it should be the year of giving yourself a break. We can still strive to achieve our goals, but not at the cost of losing ourselves in the process.
So, after some thought, I have come up with a few helpful tips to try and make 2023 a little brighter for us all.
1. Get Your Body Moving
A very wise friend of mine told me that she finds the term ‘exercise’ to be stressful, as we are constantly bombarded with fitness ads telling us to lose weight, get buff and run marathons. Instead, she uses the term ‘movement’ which I love.
Getting your body moving in any shape or form is incredible for you. Regular movement increases the amount of oxygen sent to the brain, improving your memory, attention span and all round brain function.
It can strengthen your bones and muscles and help bump up your brain’s neurotransmitters, aka endorphins, and they’re equally happy friends, endocannabinoids. These two neurotransmitters help to block pain, increase sensations of pleasure and can even create a state of euphoria.
Studies have also shown that increased physical activity can hugely benefit your mood, and can help to alleviate depression, anxiety and stress.
Overall, no matter whether you enjoy a hard core 25k run, or dance in your pants in your living room to Taylor Swift, it doesn’t matter! Just get that body moving!
2. Maintain Those Friendships
In a world that is increasingly becoming busier, louder and more stressful, I believe it is more important than ever to find moments of pure joy. And what better way to achieve that joy than with the people you love most?
As helpful as digital platforms like Whatsapp and Instagram can be (especially when locked inside during a pandemic), it’s time to venture out again and meet face to face.
Find time to reconnect with your best pals. See their smiles in person across a pub table, or get a few more laugh lines playing hide and seek in a park.
Date your friends! Take them to free exhibitions at museums, treat yourself to a nice meal in a quirky restaurant, or just stay home and watch the entire box set of Golden Girls – who knows!
Spend that crucial and quality time with them, and always remember that you are loved.
3. Sleeeeeep
I can not stress enough how important sleep is. In fact, it is vital to your emotional, physical and psychological well being.
Think of your body like a computer. Filled to bursting with wonderful, valuable information and memory. But absolutely useless if it runs out of charge.
So, let’s re-work that night time routine. Try and stay away from caffeine and sugar late at night as they can keep you awake. Create a calming environment in your bedroom. Maybe dim the lights, puff your pillows and brush your teeth early, allowing you to take your time settling down and preparing your body for a snooze.
If you have trouble nodding off, I have recently invested in some sleep pillow sprays. Though this may sound like a mad thing to purchase, they actually do make your pillow smell and feel a lot more inviting.
As my husband will attest, they knock me out pretty much straight away, leaving him a tiny happy puddle of drool, and some melodic snoring to contend with. You’re welcome dearest.
4. Practice Talking Kindly To Yourself
It’s so easy to stand in front of a mirror in your tightest pair of skinny jeans that you swore would fit you by February, and talk down to yourself. All because that apple pie you ate, that was delicious by the way, has meant you can’t do the zip up.
Or even that the 50 star jumps you were determined to do before bed actually turned out to be 20 star jumps, because who exercises before bed, and now you feel like a sweaty failure and a mess. Life is already hard enough on us, you don’t need to be harder!
An amazing friend of mine told me to talk to myself like I would my best friend, or a loved one. Instead of berating myself for those extra chips, celebrate the fact that my body has worked so hard it’s hungry! Instead of getting angry at myself for forgetting to put the washing on, celebrate the fact that I own a washing machine!
Something I find helpful is writing myself a love letter, listing off a few things I’m thankful for (my friends and family) and proud of myself for (my enormous Sims empire…).
Practice grounding yourself when those negative feelings arise, focus on your feet and the ground beneath you, and try to pull yourself back to the current moment.
It’s ok to fail sometimes, and everyone has. You can only be the best version of you if you give yourself the time and space to accept the things you can change, and the things you can not. Even though it can be hard, even one positive thing a day can make the biggest difference. So next time you catch yourself in the mirror, give yourself a wink and say: “You got this. You are enough”.
5. Drink More Water.
This one is pretty basic. Drink more water. Easy.
Our body is 70% water, and it is vital that we drink enough to keep our beautiful little machines running. Don’t get me wrong, as delicious as the Welsh Valley’s sweet spring water may taste, not every bottle is quite as fun to sip, so here are some ideas as to how to get more water into your day.
Set yourself a steady goal of how much you’d like to drink. I’ve invested in a giant reusable water bottle that tells me exactly how much I’ve drunk, and offers me very kind and reassuring words on the bottle when I’ve smashed through a hearty amount.
Maybe start replacing some of your other drinks with water. Instead of having 2 coca cola’s, maybe have 1 cheeky coke and a bottle of water. Keep your body and mind fresh as a daisy. Yum.
If you live in an area like London for example, that has a high level of pollution, I would strongly encourage investing in a water filter jug to cut down on the limescale. It really does make a difference, and keeping it in the fridge adds that extra little burst of cool!
Don’t forget: no matter how your 2022 has turned out, or how your plans for 2023 are taking shape, remember to be kind to you.
And as that clock chimes midnight remind yourself, that you are you. And to be anyone other than you would be exceedingly boring!
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